Bears wide receiver Alshon Jeffery (above) and injured linebacker Lance Briggs (left) will be in a giant tent in the parking lot at Gurnee Mills on Saturday to greet Bears fans who are willing to test-drive a new car. The event will be held in the lot nea
Updated: December 31, 2013 2:37AM
Random thoughts from someone who won’t be surprised if some study determines that the No. 1 cause of obesity in this country is the TV remote.
■ We are going to find out this weekend just how big a fan some Chicago Bears fans really are.
In advance of the Bears’ Monday night football game in Green Bay against the evil empire that is the Green/Gold, two current Bears players and two Bear legends from the Super Bowl champs of 1985 will be at Gurnee Mills on Saturday and Sunday to meet/greet fans.
Unfortunately, this is way more complicated than wishing Alshon Jeffery good luck in Monday’s game, maybe getting an autograph, and finding out if he thinks you should have him in your Fantasy Football starting lineup this week.
Here’s the CliffsNotes version of what’s going on.
In the parking lot near the “E” entrance to Gurnee Mills, there will be a giant tent set up in conjunction with the Monday Night Football Tour.
Alas, the “Tour” is literally driven by the General Motors automobile company, and when you enter that tent, you are close to the Bears players, but we have to assume you’re even closer to sales personnel from GMC.
Not only that, but in order to get into the tent, it appears you might need to register in advance at mondaynightfootballtour.com., although it does say that you can also register in person on Saturday (10 a.m. until 7 p.m.) or Sunday (11 a.m. to 6 p.m.). Spoiler Alert: Based on the online registration form, you will be way ahead of the game signing up online than you will be trying to do so in person.
Based on language on the website, in order to get to meet Alshon Jeffery (3:30-4:30 Saturday), Lance Briggs (5:30-6:30 Saturday), Otis Wilson (1-2 on Sunday) or Steve McMichael (4-5 on Sunday), you have to test-drive a new GMC vehicle.
Also, once you’re in the tent, you get to watch an exclusive NFL Films production on the history of Monday Night Football. You also will be entered for a chance to win game-day tickets and signed memorabilia. And, you can play the EA SPORTS Madden NFL 25 game.
In exchange, of course, you are sharing your email address and personal information with the good people at GMC.
That is your call to make. You just can’t wait until Monday Night Football to make it.
■ Waukegan’s own Nick Asberry will return to the boxing ring on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving as he will be part of the “Black Wednesday” card at the Horseshoe Casino in Hammond, Ind.
Nicholas is a big heavyweight (6-5, 245 pounds), who is 2-0 as a professional, having pummeled a pair of badly overmatched and out-of-shape opponents in his first two bouts at the Horseshoe.
His opponent on Black Wednesday reportedly has a professional record of 5-15, which raises the question of why someone who’s lost 15 times in 20 bouts hasn’t found something else to do for a living rather than getting punched in the face.
In any case, supposedly the opponent is tough to knock out. This will be a four-round fight and Asberry needs to start logging rounds so that he can eventually move up to six- and eight-round bouts.
Asberry has a contract with Bobby Hitz Boxing, which holds most of its fight cards at the casino. The venue is ideal in that it has atmosphere, and you can watch the bouts and then hit the casino afterward, or vice versa.
One of the fights on Black Wednesday is a battle between two unbeatens in the super-flyweight division. If Asberry develops as all hope he does, he’ll eventually be showcased at the Horseshoe.
For ticket info, see hitzboxing.com. Cost is $40 up to $90. And remember, to get there and home, you’re likely going to get slammed with the Skyway toll which will feel like it costs more than the fight-show ticket.
■ The pro basketball team that Warren High grad Brandon Paul plays for currently is 8-11 this season. The team is BC Nizhny Novgorod — a city east of Moscow — and it plays in two different leagues.
In terms of statistics, it appears that Brandon is averaging around 20-25 minutes per game and is scoring in low double-figures.
■ If you have Comcast cable TV, and you have the TV remote in your hands Saturday at 8 p.m. or Sunday at 9 a.m., go ahead and give Channel 113 a quick look-see.
It’s a taped broadcast of a Grayslake Co-Rec Softball League game featuring Emil’s against Craig Heraty.
Duane Dow, a grizzled veteran of the Chicago-area TV broadcasting wars, calls the action.
Note that in the spirit of full disclosure, at a point late in the broadcast, Duane is actually going to say something nice about the guy who wrote the words you’re reading right now.
The reason for that is this: Duane has been doing this sports-media thing for something like 82 years, and he likes to show respect to his elders, so he’s tipping his cap this way ... toward someone who passed the 82-year mark two days before wagering a silver dollar on Alexander Hamilton to win his duel with then-vice president Aaron Burr.
■ FYI: A guy appropriately named Cliff Hillegass started Cliff’s Notes in 1958.
He died in 2001 and since then, Cliff’s Notes turned into Cliffs Notes and now, today, to CliffsNotes.